MMXVII

With my high school graduation being mere days away, I took some time to reflect upon the past 4 years of my life. Who I was and who I became are complete strangers, two completely different versions of me. My experiences and memories, both happy and sad, positive and negative, shaped me into a person I am proud of being today.

Freshman year is rough for pretty much everyone. Being thrown into a new place with tons and tons of new people is nerve-wracking for a fourteen year old, especially when everyone is still trying to find themselves and their place in this world. I met my best friend to date in freshman year, and we met in the strangest way possible. I was a lot more naive, childish, and immature my freshman year.

Sophomore year was a blur to me. Most people in my school had already found their friends and established their friend groups, but I was the shy kid with just a few friends. I didn’t talk to anyone and was extremely closed off and judgmental, not letting others in. My first boyfriend screwed me over this year. I had an intimate group of people I trusted, but as a sophomore, nothing really changed. I was still naive, immature and lazy.

Junior year was definitely the most difficult year of high school for me. It was stressful, my classes got progressively harder and harder by the year and it took a toll on me. My mental health began slipping, I lost friendships, got lower grades than I wanted, and was unhappy in general. I had my first panic attack this year, and nobody to go to when it occurred. I was lonely, still lost, and everything felt helpless. This was definitely my low point, and I wasn’t sure how or when I could pull myself out of it, but I did.

Senior year was the year I became, well, me. These past nine months have been quite honestly some of the best memories of my life. I have made an extensive amount of new and close friends, and I no longer feel like I am isolated from the human race and friendless. Something about the dynamic of how I viewed my classmates and how they viewed me changed, because I became friends with people I had known all four years but never talked to. My schedule cleared up a little bit, alleviating some of the stress from school, and allowed me to focus on myself. I was able to help myself figure out the source of all of my problems and the strength from my new and old friendships gave me the courage to face them head-on. This year, I really believe I found myself and figured out the path in which I wanted to head down.

I guess the moral of the story is, be patient. Be kind. Be bold, because sometimes the things you want and need the most in life are not handed to you on a silver platter; they must be earned by taking initiative. Have an open mind, and open yourself up to new possibilities, ideas, and people. I wasn’t happy until I realized how to actually begin the search for it, which is what I’m encouraging everyone to do. Search for your happiness, and fight for it. I didn’t get it until I stepped out of my comfort zone and out of my introverted skin. My Myers Briggs Personality Test type literally changed from introvert to extrovert. I became comfortable in my skin, learned to love myself and accept my flaws, and embrace every little detail of myself and my life. I became happy because I wanted to become happy, and that’s all it really takes. I am now living my life with a constant smile on my face, with a warm and welcoming heart, and in a constant state of serenity.

In just two days, I will walk across the stage at my high school graduation and finish the final chapter of the book I have been writing for eighteen years. I will begin writing the first chapter of my adult life at the University of Colorado Boulder, and I could not be more ecstatic to see how and where my path takes me. Wherever it may be, and however it treats me, I know I will keep the courage in my heart and tackle the obstacles with the fire inside me.

Thank you for everything, high school. You were a pain in my ass most of the time, but I wouldn’t have been able to discover who I was meant to be without you.

–

E.L.

Things I Learned During My Senior Year of High School

The infamous senior year: it’s the last year of mandatory school and the final step right before the next chapter of your life. Bridges are being burnt, but some are still being built, friendships are being destroyed and others are being repaired. Throughout this time of transition, growth, and discovery, I found myself learning a few lessons that will undoubtedly be crucial to and relevant for the rest of my life.

1. Get out of your comfort zone to meet new people. Many people are under the impression it doesn’t matter getting to know kids in your high school because you’ll most likely never see them again, but senior year is the easiest year to make friends (besides freshman year) because frankly, you all start to stop caring. Throughout high school, provided you attend a public one, you have worked hard to build your own persona within the student body. You have your group of friends and your label and social standing, but when senior year comes, it all goes flying out the window. It becomes a lot easier to meet people you’ve never talked to before, because you’ve got nothing left to lose in your final year. Go out of your comfort zone and talk to someone you’ve seen in the halls before, but have never had a real conversation with. You may regret it in the future if you didn’t. I’ve made more friends in my senior year of high school than I did in the first three years.
2. What college you did or didn’t get into doesn’t determine your intelligence. Many seniors compare themselves to others based on the prestigious college they were or weren’t accepted to, but honestly shouldn’t. Colleges look at so much more than just academics, and some places just simply aren’t for some students. Wherever you get accepted to will give you an education and higher-level experience that’s worth your time and contribute to your personal growth. An Ivy League may come with prestige and glory, but don’t tunnel vision your focus on that. Focus on the right choice for you.
3. Don’t be so uptight. An unexcused absence or uncompleted homework assignment won’t kill you, it matters significantly less now than it did last year. Senior year is a time of preparing yourself for the transition into your adult life and higher education experience, not stressing over busy work for a class.
4. Cherish the time you have with teachers that actively care about you. High school teachers have the amazing superpower of being more than just educators, but also mentors. They will have advice for you and will help you through more than just academic problems. Go talk to your favorite teacher, it’ll make them feel good about their impact upon students.
5. Appreciate your parents. This is also a huge change for your family, and your parents will start missing you the moment you step foot in your dorm room. Since you are an official adult, you may find that you’ll wish you still had your mother’s meals to come home to and your father’s advice or help with homework. Now is the time to realize how much your parents have done for you for the past 18 years, and thank them for all of their unconditional love and support. You’ll miss it, trust me, and I already am even though I haven’t moved out yet.
6. College is optional, remember? You’re willingly putting yourself in a position to learn an live in an educational environment for the next four years of your life. Whether you do or don’t attend a higher-level institution, make sure you don’t just let the past twelve years of your schooling go to waste. Yes, school sucks and nobody likes it, but try looking on the bright side: where would you be today without it? Try to find something to take away from the experiences you’ve had and make the most of them.

I hope you can benefit from these little pieces of advice that I have learned firsthand from my almost-over senior year experience. Like I said earlier, you have nothing to lose this year, so go out of your comfort zone and make this last year of high school memorable!

 

–

E.L.

A Word of Advice to All Incoming and Current High School Students

In my second semester of junior year, I really took the time to think about and reflect on my high school experience. I thought about what I did, who I met and associated myself with, and I thought about what I could’ve done differently to make these past couple years better.

One: Get out of your comfort zone. You are now in high school, a new place, with new people, in a completely new chapter of your life. You don’t want to limit yourself to the same, boring, mundane everyday routines. This is one mistake I made, and I paid the price at the end of my junior year, when I reflected in my past three years of high school and realized I really didn’t do much. Sure, I was in a few clubs and I made new friends, but I wasn’t satisfied with what I did accomplish. I wish I had done more, broken out of my shell and met more people, and really make the most of my high school experience.

Two: Make new friends, but keep the old ones… and be prepared for heartache. Relationships, both platonic and romantic, are especially difficult in these years. Friends will come and go. People will not be as they seem, because they’ll put on a facade to appear as a more likable or as a “cooler” person. Also, never count on your friends for anything important—that includes your feelings. It seems harsh, but a friend you could call a best friend in freshman year could be a mere stranger by junior year. In high school, it’s inevitable. However, if there’s one thing high school will teach you and the one thing you will most likely take away from your time here, is that friendship is all about honesty and communication. Without those things, it’ll never work, and if you put the effort in, you’ll have a wonderful resource and asset as well as a friend on your side.

Three: Do your homework. Study. Talk to your teachers. Don’t slack off, keep up with your grades. If you don’t do these things, you’ll simply dig yourself into a hole that’s much harder to climb out of than to create. Never wait until the day before to study for an extremely important exam, it never works. Everything I’m saying here is learned from experience, and there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to be able to go back in time and change my study habits and mindset. It’s also extremely important to learn these habits sooner than later, because they’ll carry over to college and may even apply to the workplace.

Four: While grades won’t matter in the future, they matter now. They are your key to having a good future. If you fail one test, it is not the end of the world. Don’t hate yourself for it, instead take it as a sign to work harder next time. Never have the mindset that your grades won’t matter down the line, so it’s okay to slack, or vice versa.

Five: Start thinking about your future early. Even if you’re in freshman year, the next three years will fly by so fast and before you know it, you’ll be filling out your college applications. Think about your passions, look into some majors you’d be interested in, just poke around the bush a little. No need to do in depth research quite yet, but certainly start thinking about it, because you’ll be ahead of the game when senior year rolls around.

Six: Talk to your teachers. They’re not there just to educate you, they are real people with real lives and fascinating experiences, outside of the classroom. They are people just like you and me, and they deserve to be seen as them, not just teaching machines. The stronger the bond you build with your teacher, the better your high school experience will be, trust me. If you constantly go to them to get help, they’ll notice, and they’ll be under the impression that you care about your grades very much. And finally…

Seven: Enjoy high school. It will certainly have its ups and downs, and sometimes you’ll absolutely hate it, but the truth is you’ll never have this experience again. Make the most of it. This is the last time your education will be free, so appreciate it. It is what you make it, so if you choose to have a negative view on it, of course you’re going to hate it. Really try to look at the good things that you have and will encounter, and push through the stressful and stupid bullshit that high school does come with. Try to keep this mindset, and I guarantee you’ll have a fulfilling, enriching, benefiting four years of your youth.

It’s all about your attitude.

 

–

E.L.